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篇名: 男人女人 (文章分享)
作者: Michael 日期: 2010.05.11  天氣:  心情:
以前提到結婚,想到「天長地久」;現在提到結婚,想到「能撐多久」。                                   
                                                                                                    
 當初會結婚,說是「看上眼」;後來會離婚,說是「看走眼」。                                           
                                                                                                    
 婚前,愛情是神話;婚後,愛情是笑話。                                                               
                                                                                                    
 男人花錢,是為了讓女人高興;女人花錢,是因為男人讓她不高興。                                       
                                                                                                    
 嫁入「豪門」,要懂得理財; 嫁入「寒門」,要懂得生財。                                              
                                                                                                    
 以前的人,視婚姻生活為「一輩子」;現代的人,視婚姻生活為「一陣子」。                               
                                                                                                    
 婚前,男人在餐廳等女人; 婚後,女人在客廳等男人。                                                  
                                                                                                    
 婚前,男人經常找女人「討論」; 婚後,男人只告訴女人「結論」。                                      
                                                                                                    
 婚前,男人對她悄悄講話; 婚後,男人對她大聲講話。                                                  
                                                                                                    
 戀愛時,情話綿綿; 結婚後,謊話連連。                                                              
                                                                                                    
 戀愛時的男人,喜歡「毛手毛腳」;結婚後的男人,變成「沒手沒腳」。                                   
                                                                                                    
 婚前,情侶做什麼都是「浪漫」;婚後,夫妻做什麼都是「浪費」。                                       
                                                                                                    
 想結婚,是自己已能獨立; 想離婚,是子女已獨立。                                                    
                                                                                                    
 婚前的男人,大都很幽默;婚後的男人,大都很沉默。                                                   
                                                                                                    
 女人的記性,吵架時最好; 男人的耐性,結婚後最差。                                                  
                                                                                                    
 戀愛時,一見面就「親嘴」; 結婚後,一見面就「鬥嘴」。                                              
                                                                                                    
 婚前,男人常給女人「空白支票」;婚後,男人常給女人「空頭支票」。                                   
                                                                                                    
 戀愛時,生活「妙不可言」; 結婚後,日子「苦不堪言」。                                              
                                                                                                    
 婚前,男人天天盯著女人; 婚後,女人天天盯著男人。                                                  
                                                                                                    
 熱戀時,總相許下輩子再結良緣;結婚後,懷疑上輩子造作孽緣。                                         
                                                                                                    
 大男人,會「作威作福」; 好男人,會「作牛作馬」。                                                  
                                                                                                    
 婚前,「謊話」都是「情話」; 婚後,「情話」都是「廢話」。                                          
                                                                                                    
 婚前,靠近一點;婚後,閃開一點。                                                                   
                                                                                                    
 婚前,沒話找話說; 婚後,有話也不說。                                                              
                                                                                                    
 「成功」?對男人的定義是指能賺很多的錢, 對女人的定義是指能花很多的錢。                            
                                                                                                    
 男人有錢就變壞,女人變壞就有錢。                                                                   
                                                                                                    
 男人沒有女人,耳根清淨; 女人沒有男人,居家乾淨。                                                  
                                                                                                    
 男人「入錯行」,上班會很痛苦;女人「嫁錯郎」,下班會很痛苦。                                       
                                                                                                    
 好女人,養壞男人的胃口; 壞女人,吊足男人的胃口。                                                  
                                                                                                    
 婚前,男人像傳令兵;婚後,男人像指揮官。                                                           
                                                                                                    
 失戀不見得是世界末日: 你的心也許會「泣血」,你的荷包卻可以不再「失血」。                           
                                                                                                    
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